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Change Your Perspective

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Photography by Daniel Tapia

Why is that sometimes we will pray over something to leave our lives because we know very well that it is not good for us- yet the second it does you start to question what God is doing in your life. Why am I single again God? Why did I lose my job? Why am I broke?

You start to feel like you are almost being punished when you did nothing wrong. You feel like maybe God is trying to punish you or “teach you a lesson” but in reality you need to see what he is truly doing. Perhaps the people who are exiting your life were actually hindering your growth or your true purpose.

What if the people who are now leaving were actually people who were rooting against you? What if those people were actually praying or hoping you wouldn’t succeed? Tell me, would that change your perspective in any way? I find that so often we focus on the small negatives instead of stepping back and seeing the big picture. We continue to want things to change in our lives, or pray that God will give us some kind of breakthrough but when things do start to change –we FREAK OUT. No one really likes losing control over things, especially their life.

Personally, I have experienced this first hand in various ways. There have been times where I’ve prayed over a friendship to grow but instead the friendship started to deteriorate and we drifted. Or perhaps in a romantic relationship I have also prayed over them and instead of it getting better, things fizzled out and we stopped talking. Of course in the moment I was angry, and hurt that the things I was looking forward to were falling apart. After the fact, I saw it for what it really was because after everything was said and done I was glad I wasn’t in those friendships or with that person anymore. For one reason or another it would have never worked out and I am thankful I was able to avoid further heartache because I know in my heart that God is always looking out for me and my heart.

It is so important that we take the time to remember that in order for a shift to occur in your life, you will have to see constant change and sometimes that can mean things that we don’t necessarily like to happen. Take a moment to recognize that it is okay to not know what will happen next, it is in these moments that our Faith is truly tested. It is in the hard times that we should lean in even more, and focus on constantly growing instead of focusing on what we are missing out on or losing. If you want to see a SHIFT in your life, you need to change your PERSPECTIVE. The next time you find yourself in a trying time, step back and try to see things from a different perspective and see how this situation could be viewed as a lesson.

XO


You can also find me at:

→Instagram: @saritagisselle
→Twitter: @saritagisselle

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Then & Now

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I looked at you and noticed every new movement.

I noticed the stubble you now have,

I noticed the change in posture;

I even noticed that parts of you didn’t change at all, defying gravity and distance.

I still felt safe just knowing you were in the same room,

The familiar feeling I would never grow tired of.

It was like stepping back into time and reliving our little infinity.

I could feel your gaze resting on my face for a second longer,

Taking in how the years have changed me.

It was almost like the second chance that never was or will be.

Just like in the past, this second too did not last.

XO


You can also follow me at:

Instagram: @saritagisselle

Twitter: @saritagisselle

Turtles All The Way Down: Review

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©Copyright SARITA LOPEZ
Prologue: Hello everyone and welcome back to my blog! I wanted to begin this year off (a tad late) but to a great start! I thought, what better way than with a book review of my current favorite read thus far in 2018. I will be spacing them out within my normal posts but I LOVE reading so you have a lot to look forward to! Without further anticipation let us begin-

This book follows a young teen character named Aza who has suffers from severe anxiety, OCD.  Aza and her best friend Daisy are investigating the disappearance of the billionaire Mr. Russell Pickett in order to get the hundred thousand dollar reward. Along the way we follow an introduction of an old friend Davis, the exploration of love, and the true thoughts that constrict Aza of leading a normal life.  Throughout the book we see glimpse of what it is like for Aza on a daily basis to deal with the most mundane things, to life choices. I find it so disheartening to know that there are so many people out there who may suffer from the same or similar mental illnesses and are still trying to find the strength to get through it. At times Aza explains her illness in ways I never imagined and it really goes to show how little we really know about these interior battles they face.

A few of my favorite quotes include:

“Your now is not your forever”

“You are as real as anyone, and your doubts make you more real, not less”

I found this book to be so powerful- it is so often that we can only ‘imagine’ what people with illnesses face. This book provided me an abundance of insight into a young woman who is merely trying to heal and experience a normal high school life while her thoughts impede it every step of the way.  This is the most recent of John Greens books, however, I have read every other book he has ever written as well and this is a close second to being my favorite. The way the Green writes makes you feel as though you are living the same experiences and the characters feel like your friends. I often find myself getting lost in his books and feeling the same loss or happiness that the characters do along the way.

If you have not yet read any of John Greens books- you are missing out. My top three recommendations (if I had to choose) would be (1) The Fault in Our Stars, (2) Turtles All the Way Down, (3) an Abundance of Katherines.  If you liked The Fault in Our Stars then you will fall in love with Aza’s kind heart as well.  I always love a good book where romance and a soulmate is not the end all be all of the book, and the underlying message truly shining through.

An addition note would be to really take in what you are reading, as these are things that some people are living through and experiencing daily. It is so easy for us to ‘feel bad’ for someone without understanding what it is they are fighting for.  If you or someone you know suffers from a mental illness I have provided links that could be useful to read or just someone to talk to.


You can also follow me at:

Instagram: @saritagisselle

Twitter: @saritagisselle

 

My Reasons For Being Single

My Reasons For Being Single

I haven’t spoken about this very often here on my blog, but I wanted to try out this new writing style to connect to you guys more. I like that my blog is a creative space for me to vent and say things that I probably wouldn’t otherwise.

Well, I’ll start by saying that I have been in committed relationships and I’m not your typical girlfriend. (I bet you’ve never heard that one before).  I’m not clingy and I’m not glued to anyone 24/7, however, if I am in an exclusive relationship then I am loyal to just you. I have of course been hurt by past relationships, just like anyone else. We all experience pain. I don’t just mean pain from romantic relationships but also long-term friendships that I invested years into for it to fall apart.

As far as my friendships I am very content with the people surrounding me, and my small inner circle. I used to think that the more friends you have the deeper the friendships but that’s High School perspective or you when once you graduate it’s very rare for you to remain friends with the same people. I have about four of the friends I had in high school, and I’m perfectly content with that!

Now, when it comes to relationships I’m not going to lie I can be very detached but that’s only because I’m not trying to waste my time. I’m the type of person who will tell you straight if I’m just not feeling it, and I expect the same from the other person. Unfortunately, this isn’t always something I get in return- in fact I usually end up being the one who cares more than I should have.

For this reason, I have decided that I just have so much I have planned, and my life just has no space for anything that isn’t going to help me grow.

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I haven’t taken a relationship off the table completely because you never know, everyone tells me that the best relationships come when you’re least expecting it.

WHO KNOWS, RIGHT?!

For the time being, I’m just not trying to waste my time or fall for someone who doesn’t take me seriously. I know what I have to offer and I know that with the right person it will be a mutual growth and love and until that happens I can actively wait for it. So here’s to all us single peeps out here, just living our best lives! I don’t understand why so many people see being single as a negative thing. In my eyes I feel like you do the best when you’re not distracted, and solely focused on one thing. You can flourish in your career, you can write that book, start that blog, move to the other side of the country. You can even travel the world while you’re young! Because honestly, why not? I’m sure the right guys out there for me and until then, I’ll just be out here living my best life; finding my passions and traveling and seeing all the world has to offer.

But hey, you never know what the future holds.

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INSTAGRAM@saritagisselle
TWITTER@saritagisselle
PHOTOGRAPHER INSTAGRAM: @DanielTapia

3 Steps To Healing From Loss

3 Steps To Healing From Loss
When I look back on the loss I have experienced, it’s very humbling and empowering. I know how hard it can be to have someone there, who you see every day, and to have them gone the next day.
It’s almost as if you lose a part of you that you have already grown accustomed to – and it’s ripped away without any warning. My world had been turned completely upside down when I lost my mother. I had a bond with her that was truly unexplainable.

My world had been turned completely upside down when I lost my mother.

My daily routine consisted of work or school, sometimes both, to coming home and seeing my mom and talking to her about our days.
It was comforting for both of us to be able to vent about the things that happen at work – that feeling of “YES, YOU GET IT!” – and not having to feel like you’re burdening someone with your complaining. These seemingly normal conversations turned out to be one of the things I miss most.
This daily routine was robbed from me when she was taken from me.

I really did not know how to ‘get over it’ or ‘move on’ as outsiders advised. It’s hard enough to be dealing with loss, but to add on top of that unsupportive ‘friends’  – who at the first sign of pain they ditch you when you need them most – was worse than I could have ever imagined.

For this reason and more I have put together these 3 Steps to Healing After Loss.
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1. First thing’s first – do not isolate yourself from others. It’s true that not everyone will be there for you, but I can promise that a few friends will stand by you during the hard times.
If you are close with family (siblings, parents, etc) then do not be scared to approach them with your sorrow. It’s okay if they do not have the ‘right’ words that you need to hear because let’s be real – Who really knows the ‘right’ thing to say?
I have been on both sides of this and I can see how it’s hard for people to relate if they themselves have never actually gone through your situation.  Cut them and yourself some slack- let them just be there for you and appreciate it.
 

2. Be careful what you ‘turn to’ during this time of pain (and hopefully healing). By this, I mean that when we are hurt we all resort to different measures. For example, I wanted to always be out – drinking and partying every weekend.

You might ask yourself, ‘What’s wrong with that?’ well, that’s all fine if you’re doing it for fun. When you start to turn to these things to make you forget or numb you from what is really happening, that is when you start harming yourself. Try something that will be more beneficial to you- start a new sport, writing, painting, exercising, or whatever it is that will help your relieve your stress and pain in a healthy way.

Pain demands to be felt.

3. Lastly, but most importantly- It’s okay if it takes time. A lot of people think that you should be able to move on from loss rather quickly, but in all honesty, that is no one else’s business but yours. Only you know what is best for you and how you are feeling.  I still cry from time to time, and that’s normal.
Pain demands to be felt and you’re only human – allow yourself to feel it. When the time comes to you being able to tell your own story of loss without crying, that is when you will truly know that have learned to heal a bit and still feel their love all around.
Don’t be mad at yourself because you can’t forget someone who meant so much to you.
 
I truly hope that these 3 steps to healing from loss were helpful to you in this difficult time. Understand that you are never alone and there will always be a healthy way to cope with situations you are placed in. Life goes on and you will grow from everything you survive.

 

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INSTAGRAM: @saritagisselle
PHOTOGRAPHER INSTAGRAM: @ErickLopezFoto

I forgive you.

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I forgive you.

I forgive you because I know you don’t hurt me from a cruel place, you hurt me from pain you are feeling.

I forgive you for misplacing your anger and resentment and aiming it at me.

I forgive you for blaming me for things I had no control over or knowledge of.

I forgive you because you are broken, and it’s okay.

I forgive you because I love you.

I love you because in these broken pieces, you will find a way to put yourself back together again- you will see the masterpiece that you truly are.

I love you because you are not less than, you are enough, you are so enough that the word “enough” doesn’t even begin to describe you.

I love you because you have grown and blossomed right in from of me.

I love you because you make me a better person, you make me want to grow and love myself for who I am.

I love you because although we want the best for each other we don’t feel as though we need each other.

I love you because it feels effortless and we don’t have to force it.

I love you because you are beautiful on the inside as well.

I love you because you showed me how to love me.

Choices

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When I can’t sleep my mind starts to run WILD. Not in like a crazy way, like dark things but in the way that I start to wonder what to eat for breakfast then I wonder what to wear tomorrow, followed by wondering what the next year will look like. This is usually very late at night, because of course, when I want to fall asleep my brain is LIT.

I try to watch a show that is boring so I can fall asleep but no that doesn’t help. I try to listen to soothing music but then I have to use the rest room because there’s usually some water noises in there somewhere. I try to read but then I get really into the book I’m reading and eventually I just have to put it down. It’s not often that this happens honestly, but when it does I end up thinking about every decision I have ever made in my life up until this point.

The other night this was the case, and as I pondered over my last 24 (young)  years of life there have been some very powerful moments and it’s interesting to see how even little choices brought me to where I am today. To joining a club in high school brought me to my current church and I still have the same leaders I did in the club as I do in church and it makes me so happy to say that because the leadership at church is amazing and so LOVING which is what makes us all feel like a family.

Then I look at family and how we have grown in the last couple years. It’ll be four years in June that I lost my mom and it still feels as recent as the day it happened.  Thinking back to that time brings up very real and very raw emotions. I think back to all that day – my heart quickens in rhythm as my eyes begin to well up with tears- and my heart breaks all over again. I miss her every day and there isn’t a day that I go without thinking about her. She was so smart and hard working, shes the reason I am the way I am today and why I work so hard. My three nephews get bigger everyday and soon I won’t be the tallest in the family anymore. It’s hard to imagine that one day I will have one of those of my own but I feel it’s bound to happen. My mom had three girls, now it’ll be all boys.

My life hasn’t been perfect up until now but it has been filled with some pretty perfect moments. Everytime I got to hug my mom and see her smile make it all worth it. As mother’s day approaches it brings those sad feelings up again but I know she wouldn’t want it to be that way, she would tell me to celebrate my sisters and tell you Vee how much I admire you. The boys are so loving and pure – and so motivated because they see how much you love and encourage them.  Jen I know you’re probably reading this and were waiting to see if I’d mention you- of course. Aiden is such a great person, he’s getting so big and I know how much he has in store for his future. His complete life is you, because he see’s your hustle and I admire that about you.

Every single day God gives us another opportunity to make an impact. In someone’s life, or just someones day. What do you choose to do with that?  I don’t know about you but I’m pretty happy about the choices I’ve made so far.

I challenge you to make a choice you were scared to make before but now you grant yourself the courage to take.

-xo